Hi. Hello. Splendid day to you. How are the kids? Say hi to your wife. That would be a great way to start an introduction. Instead of saying your name when you shake a man’s hand, just go “say hi to your wife for me.” I wonder how many times you would get punched in … Continue reading Pain is Funny
Well. This journey is coming to a close, as I sit here in my hotel room in the middle of Texas with an Otis Spunkmeyer muffin by my side. What a name. Otis Spunkmeyer. I haven't written any posts in about a week or so, and that's just fine and dandy. I love sharing my … Continue reading Denver/Albuquerque/Austin
The following post contains a poem and pictures. Today's post is brought to you by Latex Chex Mix. If you're tired of the crunch but still love the taste of Worcestershire sauce, Latex Chex Mix has you covered, with a rubbery new concoction of glorious snack mix you're sure to enjoy! Some days you just … Continue reading Arches (Post 2)
Moab. Snow crab. Low jab. Not only is Moab fun to say, but it’s quite beautiful. Mmm yes quite. Indubitably. Fantastic. Tremendous. Rich. Absolutely rich. Good, clean fun for the whole family. What am I even saying? Whose couch is this? Ah, yes. Moab. I had the best time in Moab, it was definitely one … Continue reading Arches (Post 1)
Today’s blog post is sponsored by Chicano Tenders – chicken tenders with a Mexican twist! So nice to have sponsors for the podcasts. I’m filled with gratitude. And eggs. I just ate a lot of eggs. I’m filled with eggs. I have the sperm and eggs inside of me. So, where am I? Who am … Continue reading Morro Bay to Ventura
Today's blog post is sponsored by Idris Elba's Pelvis Extensions. Idris Elba's Pelvis Extensions is your one shop stop for all of your pelvis extension needs. Whether it's a mini extension or you'd like to shoot your pelvis right off your body and straight to the moon, IEPE has you covered. What did I do … Continue reading Morro Bay/Cambria
Oily toilet paper. Gross. Thank god that’s not a thing. Hi, hello. Good to be here. Happy day to you. I feel great today. Hope you’re doing well. Tell the kids I say hi. Wife okay? How’ve your parents been? Most of the time when I start writing I just begin by dumping out nonsensical … Continue reading Santa Cruz to Monterey to Morro Bay
Aaaaaand I’m off! My adventure to Austin, Texas has begun and I’m so excited I’m gonna cum! I I’m kidding, I won’t do that. At least not right now. I’m at a public restaurant, that would be very poor judgement and shockingly weak impulse control. I know there are many people reading this (probably friends … Continue reading The Start of a Journey: Windsor to Sacramento
