I wish there wasn’t so much cum on my keyboard. That should be a song. Cum On My Keyboard, by Toby Keith. Maybe I’ll write it and send it to him. Maybe I’ll write it and record it myself. Maybe I’ll become a Godfearing country artist who goes but the name “Cum Tree” and all … Continue reading Feeling Reality and Finding My Path
I'm sitting on a rock. The water flows past me, energy runs through me. I feel at home here. We weren't meant to live in four walls. It's a humid day; there was a big storm a couple of nights ago. The water covers the rocks where a woman was sunbathing last week. Something just … Continue reading Stream of Consciousness, Written at a Stream.
People are crazy. People are lazy. One person is Patrick Swayze. Wow. Great. Tremendous. What am I doing? Why am I here? Oh, yes. I was going to write about sociopaths, narcissists, and psychopaths and how our society is built to reward them. Let’s start with the good old-fashioned sociopath. If you don’t know what … Continue reading Sociopaths, Psychopaths, and Narcissists! Oh Joy!
Drama has found its way to the café today. There’s a man who is here every morning: a tall and slender black man in his older years, unhealthy teeth but a healthy smile. He holds a book and a pack of L&M cigarettes. He props up his phone and laughs often. I can tell he’s … Continue reading Café Drama
What’s your morning routine? Wake up, look at your phone, hate yourself in the shower, grab a muffin and go to work? If this sounds all too common, you should try starting your day with crack cocaine! Get high or die trying babyyyyyy. I’m kidding. Don’t start your day with crack cocaine. Don’t start your … Continue reading How to Start a Morning Routine
I’ve been in Austin for almost six months now. Somehow it feels like I’ve been here for a moment and an eternity at the same time. I’m always moving. I spent 40 days on the road on the way and am living in my third different apartment since being here. Time seems to move along … Continue reading Comedy and Relationships, Sacrifice and Struggle
Who knew three minutes of talking could be exhausting? When people find out you do comedy, they usually ask one of two questions. The most popular is: can you tell me a joke? If you’ve ever asked this question, I forgive you; but know that I’ve spent at least a minute of my life hating … Continue reading What it Feels Like to Bomb on Stage
On the surface, it may look like a war is fought between people. But it starts between the ears. The voice inside your head, the Other, whatever you want to call it: that which mediates between good and evil. That’s where war begins. I see us slipping. Collectively we have risen to great heights, and … Continue reading War is Coming
What a time to be alive. I haven’t done comedy in a few days because I’ve been a little under the weather. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it’s a weird time to be under the weather. There used to be a time where you would simply rest up, drink some emergen-C, and play … Continue reading COVID, Fear, Death, and Sharing Your Art. Neat!
Why do I write this blog? The written word. It’s a powerful thing. It can incite senseless violence, it can promote peace, it can express love and espouse hate. The written word is dangerous, more so now than ever before. Because of the internet, the written word is more accessible and permanent, instantly available to … Continue reading Solving The Blog Crisis