Today's blog post is sponsored by Herb and Gertrude's Fermented Burgers. Unlike anything you've ever tasted in your silly little life, Herb and Gertrude's Fermented Burgers will slap your tongue with a blistering combination of quality beef and barrel aged ingredients, including triple distilled pickles, sun soaked buns, and our famous anus tomatoes! Still hungry? … Continue reading Ventura/Chumash/Pt. Mugu
Morro Bay to Ventura
Today’s blog post is sponsored by Chicano Tenders – chicken tenders with a Mexican twist! So nice to have sponsors for the podcasts. I’m filled with gratitude. And eggs. I just ate a lot of eggs. I’m filled with eggs. I have the sperm and eggs inside of me. So, where am I? Who am … Continue reading Morro Bay to Ventura
Hibernating Demon Bursts Out of Texas Pipe, Killing Five — The Mad Satirist
As Texas residents continue to scramble for warmth and water amidst an unprecedented winter storm, a new and perhaps more frightening danger looms over the state. 243 more wordsHibernating Demon Bursts Out of Texas Pipe, Killing Five — The Mad Satirist
Morro Bay/Cambria
Today's blog post is sponsored by Idris Elba's Pelvis Extensions. Idris Elba's Pelvis Extensions is your one shop stop for all of your pelvis extension needs. Whether it's a mini extension or you'd like to shoot your pelvis right off your body and straight to the moon, IEPE has you covered. What did I do … Continue reading Morro Bay/Cambria
San Luis Obispo/ Montaña de Oro State Park
Happy International Day of Smacking Ass! No? That's not a thing? Well, that's a shame. Shame on you! I think, out of all the phrases in the english language, (and there are a lot) that may be my least favorite. It's like spell that a step-mother who's not cool enough to be a witch tries … Continue reading San Luis Obispo/ Montaña de Oro State Park
Santa Cruz to Monterey to Morro Bay
Oily toilet paper. Gross. Thank god that’s not a thing. Hi, hello. Good to be here. Happy day to you. I feel great today. Hope you’re doing well. Tell the kids I say hi. Wife okay? How’ve your parents been? Most of the time when I start writing I just begin by dumping out nonsensical … Continue reading Santa Cruz to Monterey to Morro Bay
Sacramento to Santa Cruz
Shooby doo da we're really off and running now, folks! I think I want that to be my preferred pronoun. Folk. I am not a he. I am not a she. I am a folk. Thank you. I don't think I've ever heard anyone be referred to as a folk, singular. You only ever hear … Continue reading Sacramento to Santa Cruz
The Start of a Journey: Windsor to Sacramento
Aaaaaand I’m off! My adventure to Austin, Texas has begun and I’m so excited I’m gonna cum! I I’m kidding, I won’t do that. At least not right now. I’m at a public restaurant, that would be very poor judgement and shockingly weak impulse control. I know there are many people reading this (probably friends … Continue reading The Start of a Journey: Windsor to Sacramento
Awkward
I'm afraid...
Subaru Crosstrek and Finding Meaning in a Modern Life
I just bought a Subaru Crosstrek. Would have bought a Lambo, but I’m not quite there yet. That’s a quote from a song by Hobo Johnson, called “Subaru Crosstrek XV” and I highly suggest giving it a listen. Even if you don’t enjoy the music, it’s sure to generate a laugh. Also, I did just … Continue reading Subaru Crosstrek and Finding Meaning in a Modern Life